I've always been fascinated by words and manipulation of them (much to the detriment of my speech) and have acquired in recent years a fairly extensive collection of cool things that other people have said. Some are profound, some are pseudo-profound... decide for yourself.
Other bits to read:
Church bulletin board - prepare to wet yourself laughing!
Twisted translations - thank your lucky stars English is your mother tongue!
The (abridged) great philosophy shit list
The future of the English language
The entries are sorted by keyword in alphabetical order,
e.g. 'I'll sleep when I'm dead' is found under sleep.
No one can give you better advice than yourself. Cicero
Total abstinence is easier than perfect moderation. St. Augustine
It's having the right attitude that's hard. Robert Pirsig (Is that the right spelling, Caro?)
There is no bad beer: some kinds are better than others. German saying
From the moment I picked the book up to the moment I put it down I couldn't stop laughing. One day I shall read it. Groucho Marx
Bugs are not going to inherit the earth, they already own it, so we might as well make peace with the landlord. T. Eisner
If I had lived my life in the consciousness of this death, everything would have been different.
Hold onto your dreams and never be a quitter because quitters never win.
Drugs have taught an entire generation of english kids the metric system. P.J. O'Rourke
I'm not as think as you drunk I am. J.C. Squire
No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness or as good as drink. G.K. Chesterton
Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. Oscar Wilde
A sense of duty is useful in work but offensive in personal relations. People wish to be liked not to be endured with patient resignation. Bertrand Russell
My education was only interrupted by my schooling. George Bernard Shaw
To err is human but to really foul things up requires a computer.
Experience is as to intensity and not as to duration.
In any field find the strangest thing and then explore it.
Failure is not hitting bottom, it's staying there.
Don't let your fears get in the way of your dreams.
A fool must be right now and then by chance. William Cowper
Better a witty fool than a foolish wit. Twelfth Night - William Shakespeare
It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend. William Blake
It's about style, it's about elegance, it's not about f***ing Fred Perry! Night club bouncer
It is freedom, of speech and conduct, which is really envied by the unsuccessful, not money or even power. Graham Greene
A friend is, as it were, a second self. Cicero
Future: that period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured. Ambrose Pierce
I have nothing to declare except my genius. Wilde
Why does death cause so much grief? It's a major disadvantage of an easy escape route.
We are all in the gutter but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
Ask yourself if you are happy and you cease to be so. John Stuart Mill
The thing with hi-tech is that you always end up using scissors. David Hockney
Alas I know if I ever were to be truly humble I'd be proud of it. Samuel Johnson
I think you need to be hung up to write. Pete Townshend
Lady Astor: Winston, if
you were my husband I would put poison in your
coffee.
Churchill: Madam, if I were your husband I should drink it.
I may not be better than other people but at least I'm different. Rousseau
You should try everything once, except incest and morris-dancing. W.C. Fields
Il vaut mieux gâcher sa jeunesse que n'en rien faire du tout.
Jogging is for those who aren't intelligent enough to watch television. Victoria Wood
We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done. Longfellow
Kill a man and you are an assassin. Kill millions of men and you are a conqueror. Kill everyone and you are a god. Jean Rostand
It is difficult for a woman to define her feelings in language which is chiefly made by men to express theirs. Thomas Hardy
Most people tire of a lecture in ten minutes; clever people can do it in five; sensible people never go to lectures at all. Stephen Leacock
Live life as an exclamation not an explanation.
Our lives are not our own, they belong to God, and we are God's people whether alive or dead. Romans 14
Living: It's the only thing worth dying for.
Experience shows us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking together in the same direction. Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
There are three stages of man: first, he believes in Father Christmas; second, he doesn't believe in Father Christmas; third, he is Father Christmas.
Mauer sind nicht für ewig gebaut.
Only the mediocre are always at their best. Jean Giraudoux
Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewal of your mind. Bible
It is not enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well. Descartes
You should try everything once, except incest and morris-dancing. W.C. Fields
We don't get older, we get riper. Picasso
Partir, c'est mourir un peu, c'est mourir à ce qu'on aime: on laisse un peu de soi-même en toute heure et dans tout lieu. Edmond Haraucourt
Think only of the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure.
Philosophy will clip an Angel's wings. John Keats
Tout le monde est privilégié. Il n'y a que les privilégiés. Albert Camus
Purity is a question of motives.
Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. Evelyn Waugh
The schoolteacher is certainly underpaid as a child minder but ludicrously overpaid as an educator. John Osbourne
I'll sleep when I'm dead. Jon Bon Jovi
It is easy to sympathise at a distance... I value more the kind word that is spoken close to my ear. E.M. Forster
There is only one thing worse than being talked about behind your back, and that's not being talked about. Oscar Wilde
For every person who wants to teach there are approximately thirty who don't want to learn. W.C.Sellar
He who can, does; he who cannot, teaches. Shaw (ironic, wouldn't you say?)
Technology - the knack of arranging the world so that we need not experience it. Max Frisch
Truth is too precious to tell every fool that asks for it.
There are many people I could
dedicate a book to, and there are many people I could name who
let me down. But you know neither at the beginning, so hold onto
your trust until absolutely sure.
Phil Cooper
There's no such thing as an ugly woman, only a lack of vodka.
There's only one way of life and that's your own. The Levellers
Love makes the world go round. Not at all, whisky makes it go round twice as fast. Compton Mackenzie
Work is the curse of the drinking classes. Wilde
Where were you when I created the world? Bible
I don't want the world to see me, coz I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am. Iris - The Goo-goo dolls
If you have any suggestions, additions, ideas, please email me: [email protected]
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